[Fushigi Yuugi] FROM THE ASHES (3/5) by Antigone After exams came summer break, Miaka and I found ourselves with a lot more free time. We both decided that was a good thing, time to rest and rejuvenate after the stress of exams and the months we spent fighting our way through the universe of the four gods. It took us about one week to realize idle time was the last thing we needed. Although she tried to hide it, Miaka began dwelling on Tamahome and the other people she left behind, becoming slightly more withdrawn and sad. I found myself waking up with more and more nightmares and no one to turn to. Plus, we were bored. After months of constant stimulus, positive or negative, the neutral of the real world was… mind numbingly dull. What were two damsels in distress to do? So it was Super Brother and his sidekick Sunglasses Boy to the rescue. Keisuke and Tetsuya took us out, invited us over, tagged along with us wherever we went… Keisuke with his drama and over protectiveness, Tetsuya with his I'm-too-cool attitude (and damn was he a cheapskate too)… but it was sweet of them. Maybe it's just because I hardly ever saw his eyes, but I found Tetsuya almost impossible to figure out. Keisuke was doing all this for his sister, but why was Tetsuya giving up his summer break to tag along with two high school girls? For Keisuke's sake? Out of the goodness of his heart? For Miaka and me? Maybe, even, for me? I used to know him as my best friend's brother's best friend, but slowly and surely he worked his way into my life until he became a constant. A rock. Although Keisuke was concerned for both of us, most of the hovering he did was over Miaka while Tetsuya would be the one to keep an eye on me. He wasn't overbearing, so I didn't get annoyed with him. (Whereas Miaka asked me to help her kill Keisuke if he asked "are you okay?" one more time). Then, one warm Sunday afternoon, we packed a picnic and drove outside of the city to the shores of the bay. The sea breezes felt good, and our mood was happy as we sat in the park. Tetsuya and I sat on the grass, side by side, overlooking the water while nearby Keisuke was busy upbraiding Miaka for eating all the food by herself. "What are you thinking about?" Tetsuya asked, turning to look at me. At first, I was surprised. I had learned to hide my emotions well, too well, in fact, so that no one ever knew what I was thinking. But then again, it was Tetsuya- he just about noticed every little detail and fact about me. I drew my knees up to my chest. "My mother. She's been worried about me, wants me to see a shrink or something. She must have noticed the scars on my wrist." I lowered my head, watched my hair as the wind tugged it into my vision. It was growing out nicely, just like I was growing away from the girl I had been. "Do you think it will help?" Tetsuya asked, removing his sunglasses to look at me closely. I punched him lightly in the arm. "Are you nuts? What am I supposed to tell her-about the book? She'll have me locked up!" He leaned back on elbows and grinned at me. "Isn't there a confidentiality thing or something?" "Not for people who rave about a portal to another world in the National Library," I retorted, feeling relaxed now. I stretched out my legs and grinned at him. I was smiling a lot more now-more than I ever had before. "Well I don't find you a danger to society, Miss Seiryuu no miko," he was smiling back, but his eyes were serious when he continued. "I'll be your shrink. I'll listen to you, anytime you want, Yui." My name, so intimately spoken, made me look up in surprise. My hand froze while brushing blonde strands of hair behind one ear. He reached up to touch the few escaping tendrils and almost in a daze, afraid to breathe, I stared at him. I felt safe, I realized, peaceful. Even though my heart was pounding, I wasn't scared. Not of Tetsuya. Never of him. The realization shocked me. He must have misread my look, because he blushed and stood up, putting space between us. "I better get back before the Yuuki siblings kill each other." "Wait-" I was about call him back to me, to tell him that I hadn't been upset by his touch. Not to feel bad. "You wanna go out sometime?" His back was to me, his hands in his pockets. I could see his shoulders trembling a bit, and a smile touched my lips faintly. He was nervous. "Sometime, sure," I answered as I caught Miaka's eye, watching us from by the picnic table. She blushed crimson and turned away quickly. I wonder what she was thinking during the silence in the car while Tetsuya drove us home. Four people came on our date. Yup, that's right. I thought Miaka would feel better if she came along, and we couldn't invite her without taking Keisuke. I thought it'd be fun, but it was not one of my better ideas. I'm not good at avoiding mistakes, am I? Nobody was happy at the start of that night. Tetsuya was irked that I dragged people along, and Keisuke was moaning over the fact that he hadn't had a date in well, ever. Miaka was being uncharacteristically quiet, which had me worrying about her and unsettled the entire night. Our table at the pizza* place had as much tension as it did greasy food, and even Miaka was hardly eating. Finally I couldn't take it anymore. "Miaka, will you stop looking at your pepperoni like it just told you your mother died?" "My food talks?" She blinked, and slowly picked up the pepperoni in question between her thumb and forefinger. "What's that?" she pretended to listen to it. "Hey, don't talk about my best friend like that! I mean, it's true but-" I blew my straw paper in her face. "Food fight!" Keisuke cried, flicking Miaka's wrist so the pepperoni flew onto Tetsuya's head. I tossed the straw from my soda at Keisuke, and Miaka aimed for a piece of crust to hit her brother but it hit me instead. So I threw a pepper at her hair. Garlic bread sailed by my ear, and hit Tetsuya, who retaliated with a mushroom. By then we were all dying of laughter, and decided to pay the check and get out of there before we were kicked out. "I thought college kids were supposed to be mature," Miaka told her brother as we ran down the street in the cool night, laughing, talking, and acting like normal teenagers. "Who told you that?" I asked, arching my eyebrows, watching as Keisuke attempted to trip Miaka. It worked. It was nice, especially when Tetsuya and I were alone on my doorstep, after Keisuke went home and Miaka went inside. He asked me not to bring the Yuukis with us on a date ever again. Then he kissed me. I had been kissed before, but it had never been pleasant. Nakago was controlling, manipulative, and his kiss was cold. After all, to him wasn't I only a means to an end? Suboshi was a child, unbalanced and confused, scared the hell out me when he so-suddenly 'attacked' me like that. And Tamahome… Well, if a man who was in love with your best friend is under the influence of a personality-warping brainwashing drugs a kiss is hardly romantic, now is it? But Tetsuya… I liked it. It was a new thing for me, to enjoy something purely for the sake of it, without it having a reason, or a meaning, or an ulterior motive. It was strange, though. He's Tetsuya, my friend, my 'shrink'. It felt weird (but good!) to think I had just kissed him. My emotions were mixed as I closed the door behind him, but I did agree to go out with him again. Sans the peanut gallery we called friends. When I entered my room, Miaka was already sitting on my bed, hugging one of my stuffed animals (I don't have any except what Miaka has given me over the years. I was never into cutesy things like that, but Miaka never seemed to get that through her head). "Hi," I said, entering my room and sitting on the edge of my bed. Miaka was spending the night, just like old times. But, not quite. Nothing could be just like old times anymore. It could only be close. "Yui-chan?" Miaka asked quietly, her head lowered and her bangs covering her eyes. "Hmm?" "Could you not bring me on any of your dates anymore?" she sounded hesitant, unlike herself. "I mean, I appreciate the gesture, but having to go out as my brother's 'date' wasn't really fun." She made a face, halfheartedly, and trailed off. "Oh, Miaka, I'm sorry," I swallowed. "I didn't mean-- I'm sorry." " "It's okay, Yui-I know you didn't. Sooo…. " She was back to her normal self again, leaning eagerly towards me. "Did he kiss you?" "What? Mi-- you're so nosy!" But my blush gives me away. "Whooo! Yui and Tetsuya, sittin' in a tree-" "Shut up, baka!" It's good to hear her giggle, but why does it have to be at my expense?! "So he *did* kiss you?" "Mou…" "On the lips?" "Oi…" "Tongue?" "MIAKA!!" We fell asleep laughing, but in the middle of the night, I woke up to her muffled sobs. I realized that in the midst of the happiness I had discovered in my newfound romance, I also wanted to cry for my best friend. Now I know how she felt about me, all those months I thought she was my enemy. What a horrible horrible feeling. TBC in part 4/5 Taka (in which Antigone writes about her lover-boy bishounen and tries not to gush too much ^^;) *Gawd, I am so sick of fic authors making their poor borrowed characters eat sushi every night. ^^; What's that about? They do have many pizza places in Japan (Yuu Watase characters tend to like fast food actually, but McDonlads isn't exactly a date place is it?) and I thought it might be a nice change from sushi (aka the-only-Japanese- food-most-American-fic-writers-can-think-of-off-the-top-of-their-head) ^_~!